Trusting God with relationships

A number of years ago I very much wanted to get married. A few years later, after meeting all the wrong people and seeing my friends get divorced, marriage was the last thing on my mind.

Then one day I realized that I really didn't have to worry about whether or not I would marry because God was in control of my life, and whatever He provided would be good. It wasn't up to me to search for a husband. My job was to express God and be about His business. He would be about mine.

As the Bible says: ''Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.'' n1 Also, ''God is able to make all grace abound toward you; that ye, always having all sufficiency in all things, may abound to every good work.'' n2

n1 Proverbs 3:5,6.

n2 II Corinthiens 9:8.

As an active Christian Scientist I had trusted God with questions of housing, employment, health, and safety. Yet I hadn't really relied on Him when it came to personal relationships. In that domain I thought I knew best what I needed or wanted. No wonder things were such a mess!

Relying on God in this area wasn't easy at first; but as I began to cease figuring who my friends would be or what constituted ''right companionship,'' I began to experience all kinds of rewarding relationships. And there was a wonderful balance. Even children, whom I had previously disliked and had done everything possible to avoid, became part of my life!

As I trusted God and discovered my own completeness as His child, I began to get along well with everyone. And as I continued to pray to see more of God's government and His love - not only for myself but for all - loneliness, jealousy , frustration, and fear vanished. I really began to enjoy life and to look forward to each day.

Before long, in a most unexpected way, I met a man who later became my husband. Neither of us was looking for anyone to marry. Neither of us was trying to impress the other. There was a natural friendship without any real effort. There was genuine love, respect, and equality.

Gradually it dawned on me that this was the man I would marry. The same thing happened to him. He had been praying about his relationship to God and quite unexpectedly he too realized we would marry. Our values, interests, and goals were perfectly matched. We really had ''kindred tastes, motives, and aspirations ,'' to use the words of Mary Baker Eddy, the Discoverer and Founder of Christian Science. The sentence reads in full, ''Kindred tastes, motives, and aspirations are necessary to the formation of a happy and permanent companionship.'' n3

n3 Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures, p. 60.

We really saw God's hand in bringing us together. We saw, too, how our relationship was not only a blessing to us but to all whom we knew.

As we let God work His purpose out in our lives, we find ourselves truly prepared and blessed. Each stage of my experience prepared me for the next. Each was an important growing time. My husband feels this is true of his life as well.

We should never limit ourselves by tenaciously clinging to our own beliefs about what is best or right. It's best to let God lead and guide, because He is our creator, and He maintains His creation in eternal harmony. This is an unshakable spiritual truth that we can begin to prove in our own lives - even if circumstances seem futile.

Remember my resistance to children? Well, I can truly say now, as Jesus did in great love, ''Suffer little children to come unto me, and forbid them not: for of such is the kingdom of God.'' n4 Opening my heart to children was a valuable lesson in love - and it has paid unexpected dividends for, through marriage, I have ''inherited'' two children and three lovely grandchildren!

n4 Luke 18:16.

As we learn to trust God totally and to love spiritually - impartially and universally - our lives are enriched in uncountable ways. DAILY BIBLE VERSE O Lord my God, in thee do I put my trust. Psalms 7:1