A suicide attack against two Istanbul synagogues this weekend killed 25 and wounded more than 300.
Berta Rayna goes to synagogue only on special occasions - like the bar mitzvah she was attending on Saturday when powerful suicide bombings hit two of the city's main synagogues. The attacks killed 25 people and injured over 300 in a strike that authorities say was perpetrated by Turks trained by Al Qaeda.
Tuesday, the red-haired grandmother was one of several thousand mourners who huddled in the freezing rain to lay to rest six victims from the Jewish community - a minority amid Muslim casualties. As Ms. Rayna stood with her daughter and granddaughter, she struggled with the images running on replay in her head: the crash of the explosion, the shattering of crystal teardrops in the chandeliers, the people who didn't make it.
Turkey's entire Jewish community is in a similar state of shock after the weekend bombings, trying to come to terms with its future in a Muslim country which has been largely hospitable to Jews - but which is no longer on the fringes of the map of the Middle East's problems. Although synagogues and individual Jews here have been attacked before, Saturday's bombings appear to mark the first time Turks have been involved in a major attack on a Jewish target. A 1986 attack on the Neve Shalom synagogue, where Rayna was on Saturday, was carried out by Palestinians affiliated with the Abu Nidal group.
"I married all three of my children there," she says, her blue eyes turning glassy behind her large spectacles. "But right now, I wouldn't go back there for quite a while."
Fears of additional attacks have raised concerns in Istanbul that the city's Jews, a largely middle-class population of about 20,000 people, will have a hard time picking up the pieces. Already, many of the city's approximately 15 synagogues are in well-guarded, unmarked buildings, while youth and social clubs are tucked anonymously into quiet side streets.
Still, the community had been undergoing something of a renaissance in the past few years, with an upsurge in cultural activities. In September, the community participated in a European-wide day of Jewish culture by holding openhouses in all of its synagogues, institutions, and museums. Now, those doors are likely to close - all social activities and meetings have been canceled until further notice.