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Why don't people act their age?

I don’t want to Twitter and Tweet. I want to play bingo and enjoy the early bird special.

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It's a difficult time of life because, essentially, I’m not sure what time of life it is. Like so many other people of my generation, I am torn between yearning to yell out B-I-N-G-O and panting at the prospect of going on Facebook.I am definitely conflicted. Do I look for condominiums in Florida or get a sleeping bag for the rock festival in Coachella?

I am confronted by these seemingly disparate choices because recently the generation gap has closed faster than a Bernard Madoff investment fund. It used to be each generation knew what it should be doing. Not these days.

We are all either very young, young, or still young. Everyone at every age believes, despite full-length mirrors, that they are hip, cool, hot, with it, and where it’s at. With iPhone in hand, they can act up to the minute, hot off the press (the electronic kind), and in sync with rock groups other than *NSYNC.

I blame all this loss of generational predictability on the Internet. Once you jump onto it, you have access to the kind of up-to-the-second information that used to be reserved for the most au courant of the young.

Now whether we’re singing along with Mitch or Rihanna, we all know, seconds after it happened, who did what to whom. We know what is happening with the famous and those yearning to be famous. No longer do we have to depend on our children to tell us who is going to be “in” or “out” next week. We tell them.

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