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Human Barbie: What dads need to tell their daughters

Reports of women aiming to resemble 'Human Barbie' dolls have been in the news, prompting one father to wonder what daughters might need to hear to realize that trying to look plastic is not really beautiful. 

  • By James R. Jackson Guest blogger

Earlier this week I was reading an article on Yahoo about a 16 years old girl who looks like a “Human Barbie” doll.

I can remember (back in the day) when having a Barbie doll as a little girl was the big thing. All the little girls wanted to come over to your house to play Barbies with you. Then as you got older, you stopped playing with Barbie, and started collecting them.

Now, I am not sure what is happening in the mindset of the individuals of this generation wanting to be like Barbie in real life.

I believe we as parents (especially dads), have to tell or express and give our daughters as much love as possible.

As I continued to read the article, I began to ask myself, "What is going on in a young person's head that would make her want to be or look like something made from plastic?” There is nothing humanistic about being or becoming like a doll because it's not real!

Which lead me to think about this little girls parents. The mother and the father, where were they and what were they doing or saying to allow their daughter to lose touch with reality? 

We should be letting our girls know that they are beautiful from the inside out, not from the outside in. Remember people, beauty is only skin deep, but ugly is to the bone.

With all these questions, I began to look at my own daughters. I wanted them to know how much I loved them and how proud of them I am. I never got the opportunity to show them a father’s love as much as I would have liked in their young lives. Just to say, “I appreciate you as the young ladies you all have become. There is nothing that will replace a Daddy’s Girl.”

So, I decided to sit down and write them a little a letter. Here it is:

To my daughters,

Today, I had an opportunity to read something that really put things in perspective for me regarding our children, especially our daughters.

So, I thought if I would ask my daughters what they needed to hear most often from their daddy, they would probably share something like this:

“I love you”

“You look beautiful today.”

“You’re going to do great today.”

“I’ll always love you no matter what you do.”

“You can talk to me about anything.”

“Having you was one of the best days of my life.”

The daddy and daughter relationships can be central to shaping a girl’s future. It teaches a daughter about love, real love. It helps with her confidence and guides her in her own relationship decisions. It is an amazing feeling for a young girl to know she has a daddy who will protect her, love her, and encourage her. 

Mothers, grandparents, and other relatives can be key too, especially if there is no father figure directly present. Although I didn’t grow up with my dad in the home with me, I wish I could have talked to him about some things to get a better understanding than what I have today. But, I praise God for the fathers that He did surround me with and great examples that were just a phone call away. But even with that, I wanted more. 

A young girl needs daily reminders of just how awesome she is and how much she is adored by the people she loves the most. Believe it or not, it means even more when it comes from her daddy.

I truly love my daughters, all of them, including my own biological daughters, and those who came through marriage or ministry … and the list goes on.

I want you to know that I’m very proud of who you have become – women of virtue, strong providers, full of wisdom and generous – as we learn from the ancient Proverbs.

You all mean so much to me. Alright? Well if you don't know, now you know. 

Love you much, 

Dad

The Christian Science Monitor has assembled a diverse group of the guest bloggers to represent a wide array of family and parenting perspectives. Our guest bloggers are not employed or directed by the Monitor, and the views expressed are the bloggers' own. Bishop Dr. James R. Jackson is the Pastor of the House of Faith Worship Center in Virginia Beach, Virginia. He is a pastor, counselor, adjunct professor, life coach, and motivational speaker.

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