Etc.

You couldn't wait, could you?

When Iranians make news anymore, it's usually because of their determined pursuit of nuclear power. Not this time – although determination of another sort was involved. If you missed it, organizers in Tehran, the capital, came up with the idea of a campaign to promote healthy eating that would be part of a national food festival held last Friday. Its centerpiece: a sandwich. But not just any sandwich; it would be stuffed with a savory mix of high-protein meats (chicken and ostrich), seasoned with mustard and spices, and prepared by a battery of cooks. A battery? Yes, because this particular sandwich would be a whopping 4,921 feet long as it rested on a line of tables in the city's leafy Mellat Park. The meat took two days to cook because there was so much of it: 3,086 pounds. Right, more than 1-1/2 tons. Perhaps you've guessed that this also was aimed at qualifying for a Guinness Book of World Records listing. Alas, as TV news crews arrived to cover the lunchtime ceremony, so did hundreds of spectators. And before the organizers could step to the microphone to make their remarks, the crowd surged forward. In short order, the aromatic concoction was reduced to crumbs, and it hadn't even been measured yet to prove that the existing record for longest sandwich (4,521 feet) was now obsolete. Just enough videotape had been shot by the TV people, however, that the Guinness editors will have a basis to consider the Iranian entry. Or at least that's the hope. Oh, in case you were wondering, promoters say ostrich meat not only is tasty but also low in fat. Iran is the world's third-largest producer of the flightless birds.