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It's London Olympics meets 'Jersey Shore': Welcome to the Velodrome

From funny helmets to pizza-cutter bikes, track cycling at the Olympics Velodrome is one part aerodynamics, one part athleticism, and one part vaudeville.

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Cyclists compete in a women's track cycling keirin heat in the velodrome during the 2012 Summer Olympics Friday in London.

Matt Rourke/AP

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[Editor's note: This article is completely offensive to every track cycling fan. We suggest you post two comments and come back in the morning.]

To the uninitiated American, the Summer Olympics hold many strange sights.

For example, the competition at the trampoline venue Friday was fierce.... And that was not nearly as odd as the journalist next to me in the press center letting out whoops of joy at the end of each successful trick. He was transfixed

And the table tennis? Is it really necessary to throw the ball 600 feet in the air before serving? I'm just saying. 

But surely some of the stranger sights in these Olympic Games must be at the London Velodrome. I'm guessing that NBC isn't squirreling away hours of men's team pursuit footage to run on its prime time broadcast, so allow me to set the scene for you.

The first thing that you notice at the Velodrome is that Occupy Wall Street appears to have set up camp in the interior of the track. While skinny people on bicycles rumble around on a track that looks like it was designed by Salvador Dali, the real action is on the infield. Here, racers repeatedly strip down and redress, somehow managing to keep it all PG-13, while coaches huddle, techs pretend they are Han Solo on the Millennium Falcon, and Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart secretly hold hands. (OK, maybe that last one isn't true.)

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