Etc.

Oh, well done!

There are fast-food outlets that hire teenagers to flip burgers. And then there's Mallie's Sports Grill & Bar. The beef patties coming from its kitchen can take as many as three grown men to flip. And they don't use ordinary spatulas, either; nothing less than steel sheets will do the job. If you sense another attempt to win a listing in the Guinness Book of World Records, you're right. Last Saturday afternoon, as TV cameramen, Mayor Norma Wurmlinger, and other customers crowded the dining room of the Southgate, Mich., establishment, the staff wheeled out what it contends is the "largest hamburger commercially available," a 134-pound concoction garnished with cheese, bacon, lettuce, tomato, onion, and pickles ... between the halves of a bun that itself weighed 50 pounds. It took 12 hours to prepare and – together with French fries and soft drinks – was priced at $350. And, yes, somebody bought it. Now that the record-setting attempt is over, owner Stephen Mallie plans to add the mammoth creation to his menu, as a step up from the 6-pound "Monster Burger" and 12-pound "Absolutely Ridiculous Burger" that already are there. But anyone who wants to order one must give 24 hours' notice. Just in case the eaters have any room left after finishing it, Mallie's also offers a "colossal" sundae made with an entire gallon of ice cream. Oh, back to that humongous burger for a moment: The mark currently recognized by the Guinness folks is 123 pounds, set just last year by a pub in Clearfield, Pa.