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NEVER MIND, I'LL DO IT MYSELF The survey of 1,000 people was taken in Germany, but one suspects its findings will strike a responsive chord in women everywhere. A whopping 71 percent of female respondents said the men in their lives take so long to finish even the most routine of household chores that they'd just as soon do the work themselves. The same percentage said men tend to pull a disappearing act when housework piles up to the point that it no longer can be ignored. As for the male respondents, 47 percent agreed this was true.

BUT THE ART WORK WAS GREAT There are folks who regret being tattooed, and then there's Joseph Beahm. He paid for one at a coastal New Jersey parlor that depicts being stabbed in the back, with the words: "Why not? Everyone else does." Only the tattoo artist spelled else "elese." "You learn," Beahm grumped, "to spell that word by the sixth grade." Ah, but the artist says Beahm OK'd the whole design, including the error, in advance.

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European airports are hit by more and more delays The International Air Transport Association says delays due to air-traffic problems have risen 33.5 percent over the past three years at airports in 32 European countries. Delays are reportedly most severe at Milan's Malpen-sa Airport, where 75 percent of all departures and arrivals were late in the April-to-June quarter. Delays at Spain's Barcelona and Madrid airports were said to be almost as frequent. In a list compiled by the International Airline Passengers Association, a consumer group with some 400,000 members, the following were the most frequent complaints filed by airline passengers in Europe from January through July this year (in percents):

Delayed flights 22%

Poor service on ground 20%

Overbooking/bumping 10%

Poor service in the air 10%

Lost, missing, or delayed luggage 8%

Flight cancellations 8%

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Poor air quality on plane 3%

Damaged luggage 3%

- Associated Press

(c) Copyright 1999. The Christian Science Publishing Society

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