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Beyond the hookup: Some Gen-Y singles like old-fashioned dating

The conventional dating wisdom of the hookup culture is not embraced by all Gen-Y singles.

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Some Gen-Y singles like old-fashioned dating, despite the conventional dating wisdom of the hookup culture. This article is part of the cover story package for the Feb. 13, 2012 issue of The Christian Science Monitor weekly magazine.

Photo: Ann Hermes/Staff, Illustration: John Kehe/Staff

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Not everyone in Gen-Y buys into the generation's conventional dating wisdom, compartmentalizing the physical and emotional.

Many young singles say they don't participate in the hookup culture, even though they may see it happening around them. And research shows it becomes less prevalent as Millennials get older. Some young men and women choose to just "hang out" in ways that resemble more traditional dating, either spending time together as friends or dating without the casual sex.

Ashley Shafer, for instance, comes from a traditional Christian background, and says as far as hooking up or friends with benefits, "I don't go in for that. I don't put myself in environments where that's expected."

Recently graduated from Biola University, a Christian school in La Mirada, Calif., Ms. Shafer says the men she met there often shared her values. She spent time with lots of them at school, going out for coffee, studying, or seeing a movie. Sometimes feelings developed on one side or the other, but none evolved into dating that involved sex.

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